At www.thebodycamp.com in Ibiza we are very privileged to meet many guests from various different countries. People soon realise the importance of taking ownership of their life and how they make key decisions – especially after our mindful talks on behaviour. They begin to understand that blaming external events or other people for the way they feel is pointless as these factors are all out of their sphere of control. Bottom line, only you control the way you feel and not understanding that is called “Victim Thinking”.
WE CREATE THE WAY WE RESPOND INTERNALLY!
Victim Thinking: when a person feels like a victim to certain circumstances, events or other people’s words and actions. The cycle is often self-perpetuating and “victims” (once they have a great victim story to share with other people) may turn to alcohol, drugs or comfort foods – which in turn is supported by a story or event, so that they can remain a victim, sometimes for life. Using this method of thinking, they don’t need to take responsibility for their actions or current situation and thus never have to take action to rectify the situation.
Total responsibility for your life means that everything in your life:
YOUR LIFE = YOUR RESPONSIBILITY
Remember, your entire world is your own creation and life is simply a consequence of all the decisions you are making on a day-to-day basis. All day, circumstances are happening beyond our control. It’s up to us to understand that REAL POWER comes from taking responsibility (response-ability – our ability to respond positively) and remembering we are AT CAUSE in our world – at all times. Being responsible for what we say or do is one thing….. Being responsible for what everyone in our life says or does is quite another – its none of our business what everyone else thinks or says about us!
If you take complete responsibility for your life, then everything you see, hear, taste, touch, or in any way experience is your responsibility because it’s your life. This includes the macro such as: Brexit, the US President, the economy, the upcoming General Election as well as the micro.
Anything you experience and don’t like – is for you to digest, pause, think over, heal and react/respond to, in a positive way. Certain problems created by others don’t exist, in a manner of speaking, except as projections from inside you. The problem isn’t with them, it’s with you, and to change them, you have to change you! This is especially true in relationships… Blame is far easier than total responsibility – Blame disempowers us and makes others seem stronger.
It turns out that loving yourself is the greatest way to improve yourself and as you improve yourself and take responsibility, you will improve your own inner world…
Regain control of your car, on the brilliant road journey of life and understand that blaming everyone else is very disempowering and simply just “victim thinking”.
Rick Parcell
Strategic Intervention Coach